Mark D. Colafranceschi
Mark D. Colafranceschi
Click below - No Charge.
Click below - No Charge.
Anxiety is feeling threatened by something real or imagined and it is life-saving and essential. When anxiety overwhelms, there is an imbalance in the nervous system. The Nervous System is supported by or interfered with by physical, biochemical, and emotional factors.
The parasympathetic nervous system is a part of your autonomic nervous system that regulates metabolism, heart rate, breathing, and hormone production. The parasympathetic nervous system is about slowing things down – rest and digesting. It slows down thinking breathing and metabolism. Decreases anxiety.
The sympathetic nervous system is about speeding things up – fight or flight, it increases anxiety.
There is a purpose and function for both systems. Digestion, sex, and sleep require parasympathetic nervous system function without interference. Activity, work, problem-solving, exercise, and threats require the sympathetic nervous system to be functioning.
The sympathetic nervous system fights or runs until the threat (snake) is gone then we rest. The problem is when the threat is imagined, internal, or ‘not real” the nervous system holds on to the threat (it never gets to rest). The imagined/internal or not real threat gets resolved with the Ultimate Exercise in this course.
Both systems are affected by physical, biochemical, and emotional factors (addressed in this course).
With an imbalance in both Parasympathetic Nervous System and Sympathetic Nervous System (too much), we see a need for certain nutrients or minerals.
Physical activity balances both parts of the nervous system.
Negative ways we bury the anxiety
1. Substances - alcohol, food, caffeine, tobacco, pot, recreational drugs, meds
2. Impulse - gambling, drama, anger, sadness
3. Behavior - work, internet, work, social media, video games, porn, sun tanning.
Real threats invoke anxiety and require action. Perceived threats invoke anxiety and require action. That means we can't ignore the reckless speeding car driving next to you, nor should we ignore you feeling threatened by life situations.
What would you tell your holistic or medical physician if they told you to cover up your anxiety from a real threat like speeding/reckless car driving next to you or a rattlesnake in front of you with a medication or pill?
When your holistic and medical physician tells you to respect and act upon the warning from the anxiety of the real threat and then tells you to cover up the anxiety from the perceived threat we get really confused.
The purpose of anxiety is connected to fear, anger, and survival. Any dangerous situation requires an escape route (even perceived threats). Threats/fear can be real or imagined. Real risks and the anxiety invoked are life-saving or protective. Those not feeling any anxiety or fear put themselves in danger and at a higher likelihood of preventable death. No anxiety is dangerous; too much is paralyzing.
It has been observed that many people (especially men) will not admit or don't consider their anxiety symptoms to be anxiety. Some call it stress or anger; others deny it.
Imagined or perceived threats cause anxiety to serve the purpose to make you look internally at the buried feeling. Often an anxious person is trying to control the external, so they don't have to go to the hard-to-go places of feelings (like distrust or control). After a failure to control the external, the anxiety can trigger you to look inside. While most doctors don't encourage you to look inside rather, they sell you a pill or treatment. Admitting you have trust, control, perfection, or competition issues allows you to get out of the anxiety trap.
All anxiety is a symptom of threat. Is the danger real or imagined, manageable or not? The feelings connected to these symptoms get buried and harm you - causing the feelings of anger, fear, or panic to continue to cycle until you address the cause.
The line between anxious people and the other extreme of those who are devoid of anxiety is a balanced, high-functioning, resilient person. Resilient people feel anxiety, react with strength overdependence, with ambition over perfection, patience over being harsh, trust over distrust, etc. (*see Ultimate Exercise)
The resilient person may show emotion, frustration, anger, or fear but does so for a short period and then responds. The anxious trapped person looks outside themselves to blame or justify; the resilient person looks inwards and responds. One buries feelings, the other comforts the feeling.
If anxiety is not addressed, the destructive aspect is cognitive distortions or judgments, creating problems in your life, from panic, withdrawal, depression, and insomnia, leading to the illness's progression. Physically anxiety causes a list of ailments from stomach or digestion illness, sexual problems, sleep disturbance to muscle tension, and many other conditions and symptoms including cancer and heart disease. All of which are intended to direct you to the buried, anxious feeling.
The purpose of anxiety is to tell you there is something that needs to be addressed. It is a fire alarm.
Insomnia and depression are usually directly linked to mismanaged anxiety.
Anxiety, at its core, is a need to control situations to feel safe. To worry about justifying the control issues. It is almost always connected with feelings like mistrust, dependence, control, perfection, isolation, obsession, competition, comparing, and compulsion. (Note, you could have only one of the preceding and have debilitating anxiety)
Personality issues with anxiety are linked to being unconscientious versus conscientious, closed versus open, disagreeable versus agreeable, and neurotic versus neutral. All of which are changeable and manageable. (see advanced class)
Often people with anxiety believe that they need to be perfect, unrelenting, angry, afraid, harsh, overachievers, and or superior to compensate for hidden feelings. Mainstream counseling and holistic and medical medicine misguide people into believing that anxiety is a disorder or disease requiring treatment and pills. When you step back and ask, 'what is anxiety?' You begin to realize that anxiety is a symptom, not the cause.
When the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety, insomnia, or panic makes us look at emotions, we thank the anxiety for its useful purpose. When anxiety is seen as 'bad' or as an illness, covering up the symptoms will build up the buried issues leading to the destructive phase of anxiety.
Accepting that anxiety is purposeful and applying the E-Link and Ultimate Exercise (to follow) will shift the anxiety, control, trust, etc., issues. into healing.
The Physiological Purpose:
The physiological purpose of anxiety is to release cortisol and other stress hormones. This is helpful or essential to survival. Otherwise, known as the fight or flight response. Cortisol is catabolic and necessary to create fuel to deal with stress. Anxiety purposefully causes:
Mental awareness or alertness.
Slowing down or speeding up the digestive system.
Changing in breathing.
Changes in heart rate.
Change in muscle tension.
Cortisol is an amazing helpful hormone that helps us survive. It can also be destructive.
THIS IS WHY WE CRAVE SUGAR
The above responses are constructive and helpful, so we can be alert and react quickly to reckless cars or rattlesnakes. Increasing mental awareness through physiology is essential to survival. The hard leap to make is that buried feelings are as dangerous as the snake or reckless driver.
If we don't deal with underlying emotions or feelings anxiety becomes destructive to the immune system, neurological, digestion, and cardiovascular system. If we did not become anxious and vigilant our species would not have evolved and survived real environmental threats. As described above, those with healthy levels of anxiety are less likely to be in accidents. The goal of this teaching is to have you understand where the constructive aspects of your anxiety slip into destructive in your life. The Ultimate Exercise to follow will guide you.
When the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety, insomnia, or panic makes us look at emotions, we thank the anxiety for its useful purpose. When anxiety is seen as 'bad' or as an illness, covering up the symptoms will build up the buried issues leading to the destructive phase of anxiety. Accepting that anxiety is purposeful and applying the Ultimate Exercise will follow.
You may be thinking that this work suggests that you are being punished with anxiety because you are controlling, untrusting, etc. and this makes you a bad person. This thinking will make the E-Link impossible to accomplish. Blame, fault, and shame are not a part of healing. With most illnesses, people feel shame, guilt, or embarrassment for being ill/sick. There is often a feeling of being punished by the illness. This phenomenon is not talked about in the medical community, yet whether the diagnosis is cancer, high blood pressure, or anxiety the feeling of being punished is there. Now the E-Link suggests that someone that experiences anxiety is feeling untrusting or controlling. You may perceive s this as a suggestion that an anxious person is being punished? The answer is NO. Rather, they are being guided to make a change internally.
The difference between being responsible and owning your feelings versus blaming and buried feelings must be established. Being responsible for your personality, actions, buried feelings, and life traps will lead to healing. If growth is sought we do not look at failure as punishment, rather we look at failure as a guide. When someone is feeling anxious they are missing the mark. The Ultimate Exercise will teach you how to stay on track.
Blaming your actions, personality, and feelings on genetics, bad luck or chance will make you sicker because it makes changing/healing impossible.
As you complete the lesson to come, you will free yourself from the thinking that keeps you hostage to blame, shame, guilt, and punishment.
The Step to resolve:
Understanding the three contributors to anxiety - Physical, Biochemical, and Emotional
Learn the E-Link
Do the Ultimate Exercise
Real threats invoke anxiety and require action. Perceived threats invoke anxiety and require action. That means we can't ignore the reckless speeding car driving next to you, nor should we ignore your feeling threatened by life situations.
What would you tell your holistic or medical physician if they told you to cover up your anxiety from a real threat like speeding/reckless car driving next to you or a rattlesnake in front of you with a medication or pill?
When your holistic and medical physician tells you to respect and act upon the warning from the anxiety of the real threat and then tells you to cover up the anxiety from the perceived threat we get really confused.
The purpose of anxiety is connected to fear, anger, and survival. Any dangerous situation requires an escape route (even perceived threats). Threats/fear can be real or imagined. Real risks and the anxiety invoked are life-saving or protective. Those not feeling any anxiety or fear put themselves in danger and at a higher likelihood of preventable death. No anxiety is dangerous; too much is paralyzing.
It has been observed that many people (especially men) will not admit or don't consider their anxiety symptoms to be anxiety. Some call it stress or anger; others deny it.
Imagined or perceived threats cause anxiety to serve the purpose to make you look internally at the buried feeling. Often an anxious person is trying to control the external, so they don't have to go to the hard-to-go places of feelings (like distrust or control). After a failure to control the external, the anxiety can shift you to look inside. While most doctors don't encourage you to look inside rather, they sell you a pill or treatment. Admitting you have trust, control, perfection, or competition issues allows you to get out of the anxiety trap.
All anxiety is a symptom of threat. Is the danger real or imagined, manageable or not? The feelings connected to these symptoms get buried and harm you - causing the feelings of anger, fear, or panic to continue to cycle until you address the cause.
The line between anxious people and the other extreme of those with cut-off feelings is a balanced, high-functioning, resilient person. Resilient people feel anxiety, react with strength over-dependence, with ambition over perfection, patience over being harsh, trust over distrust, etc. (*see Ultimate Exercise)
The resilient person may show emotion, frustration, anger, or fear but does so for a short period and then responds. The anxious trapped person looks outside themselves to blame or justify; the resilient person looks inwards and responds. One buries feelings, the other comforts the feeling.
If anxiety is not addressed, the destructive aspect is cognitive distortions or judgments, creating problems in your life, from panic, withdrawal, depression, and insomnia, leading to the illness's progression. Physically anxiety causes a list of ailments from stomach or digestion illness, sexual problems, sleep disturbance to muscle tension, and many other conditions and symptoms including cancer and heart disease. All of which are intended to direct you to the buried, anxious feeling.
The purpose of anxiety is to tell you there is something that needs to be addressed. It is a fire alarm.
Insomnia and depression are usually directly linked to mismanaged anxiety.
Anxiety, at its core, is a need to control situations to feel safe. To worry about justifying the control issues. It is almost always connected with feelings like mistrust, dependence, control, perfection, isolation, obsession, competition, comparing, and compulsion. (Note, you could have only one of the preceding and have debilitating anxiety)
Personality issues with anxiety are linked to being unconscientious versus conscientious, closed versus open, disagreeable versus agreeable, and neurotic versus neutral. All of which are changeable and manageable. (see advanced class)
Often people with anxiety believe that they need to be perfect, unrelenting, angry, afraid, harsh, overachievers, and or superior to compensate for hidden feelings. Mainstream counseling and holistic and medical medicine misguide people into believing that anxiety is a disorder or disease requiring treatment and pills. When you step back and ask, 'what is anxiety?' You begin to realize that anxiety is a symptom, not the cause.
When the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety, insomnia, or panic makes us look at emotions, we thank the anxiety for its useful purpose. When anxiety is seen as 'bad' or as an illness, covering up the symptoms will build up the buried issues leading to the destructive phase of anxiety.
Accepting that anxiety is purposeful and applying the E-Link and Ultimate Exercise (to follow) will shift the anxiety, control, trust, etc., issues. into healing.
The physiological purpose of anxiety is to release cortisol and other stress hormones. This is helpful or essential to survival. Otherwise, known as the fight or flight response. Cortisol is catabolic and necessary to create fuel to deal with stress. Anxiety purposefully causes:
Summary
Example. Changing from external to internal: The Anxious person believes it is external, permanent, and pervasive.
Example
Example
Changing from external to internal: The Depressed person believes it is external, permanent, and pervasive.
GLOSSARY E-LINK:
Proximate Cause: is the closest cause linked to the illness or event. (i.e anxiety caused by work project not being perfect)
True Cause: The beginning of the cause and effect. (i.e. anxiety caused by a trust, control, or perfection issues)
Purpose: The reason for which something happens.
Secondary gain: The benefit or advantage that happens secondary to the actual illness.
Temporary Admission: A nonpermanent and specific admission relating to Cause and effect, temporarily admitting your vice.
Goal: Desired result from an effort.
THE E-LINK
Science has established that there is a chemical/nutritional link to the majority of health issues. Medical science has established that over ninety percent of cancers, the majority of heart disease and diabetes are diet and consumption-related. It is also established that there is a physical connection to illness, or injury, from not enough exercise to over-exertion. The majority of illness is a combination of physical and chemical issues with one other missing piece of the puzzle we call, the E-Link.
Buried emotions purposefully cause illness. However, many don’t believe the opposite – that overcoming these buried emotions and personality issues will allow you to heal. If anxiety is caused by a trust, control, perfection, dependence, etc, issues that the opposite must apply.
Healing requires that we address buried emotions, it requires being open to change. At first, your knee-jerk reaction may be to ignore the stress that caused the anxiety. and look for a pill or diet that makes the pain go away. This is what holistic and medical doctors do - they convince and sell you pills, diets, and treatments, ignoring the cause.
Two things are certain: our mind and body are connected, and epigenetics (lifestyle) is of more significant influence than genetics. Our nervous system connects our brains, endocrine system, and immune system to each cell in our body. This work is connecting our behavior, feelings, emotions, and personality that triggers an immune response. This is also connected with the nervous system storing and organizing buried feelings, and you have the E-Link.
If it is true that emotions are connected to illness, what is the purpose of making ourselves sick with buried feelings? The work below will set out to explain the biological purpose and connect the purpose of illness connected to human consciousness.
We are taught that there is no constructive purpose to your illness or condition, be it anxiety, depression, weight gain or high blood pressure, etc. This will lead you to search for pills and treatments. Once your condition's purpose is explained, covering symptoms or conditions with pills and treatments becomes a painful option.
ANXIETY
Proximate Cause: Any threat real or perceived.
True Cause: past trauma, abuse, or grief. Subconscious fear.
Purpose: To tell you there is a threat or danger, real or perceived. The purpose of anxiety is connected to survival and finding an escape route. Real risks and the anxiety invoked are life-saving or protective. (see previous class)
Secondary Gain: If I have control, I am safe. I use worry to justify my control issues. If I worry, bad things don’t happen.
Temporary Admission (connected to a Vice): I want to be in control to feel safe. I don’t trust. I am dependent. I am untrusting. I am compulsive. I need to be perfect, If I don’t do it myself, people will let me down. People are out to get me. Ultimate Exercise: Untrusting, Controlling, Inferior, Superior, Dependent, Afraid, Shame, Guilt, Vulnerable, Scarcity, or Defective.
Goal: I let go of my need for control, I trust in the process, I don't need perfection I want ambition, strength and diligence and I trust myself and the people around me. To be: Equal, Balanced, Diligence, Strong, Value, Courage, Loyal, Connected, Peace, Strong
INSOMNIA
Proximate Cause: Unresolved processing of thoughts from the day. Diet, alcohol, drugs.
True Cause, past trauma, abuse, or grief. Subconscious fear.
Purpose: Sleep allows you to process, detox, digest, and assimilate the thoughts, actions, etc. of the day.
Secondary Gain: See anxiety, guilt.
Temporary Admission (connected to a Vice): I feel guilty, I can’t let go, I can't figure this out. UE: Afraid, Passive-Aggressive, Disconnected, Controlling, Untrusting, Competitive, or Guilty.
Goal: I let go, I want to know, I have gratitude. - to move from the vice to the virtue of Balance, Diligence, Connected, Peace, Strong, and Courage.
ADRENAL
Proximate Cause: Too much accelerator or pedal without balanced breaking. Being too competitive, being hard on yourself. Alcohol abuse, sugar abuse. Over-exercising or overworking. True Cause, past trauma, abuse, or grief. Subconscious fear.
Purpose: Healthy adrenal glands balance hormones for stress, survival, and sexuality; they control blood sugar and burn protein and fat. Stress management starts with adrenals functioning well.
Secondary Gain: A time to rest. I have an excuse for failure - I am exhausted. Being defeated is painful, so I need a reason to rest.
Temporary Admission (connected to a Vice): I am exhausted(ing), I am defeated(ing), I am competing, I blame myself, I am hard on myself, I am going in the wrong direction, off track. UE: Superior, Inferior, Afraid, Competing, Controlling, Perfection, Unrelenting, Vain, Insecure, Untrusting, or Disloyal.
Goal: I don’t need to compare myself to others to win. I have self-control. I am at ease.- to move from the vice to the virtue of Courage, Strength, Diligence, Humility, etc.
Now that we are introduced to the E-Link, the next step is doing the Ultimate Exercise.
"My elevated blood pressure is bad" or, "My blood pressure is great right now."
Change this mindset/talk to, "I feel drained when my blood pressure is elevated" or, "My energy and clarity are ideal when my blood pressure is in this range."
"I have been good with my diet" or "I have been bad with my diet."
Change this mindset/talk to, "I have eaten non-inflammatory foods and feel energized" or, "I have eaten pro-inflammatory foods, and I feel fatigued."
"I have been good and have not eaten chips for two months."
Change this mindset/talk to, "I have chosen not to eat chips because they interfere with my purpose, goals, energy …"
"I am bad for enjoying this donut because it tastes good to me." Change this mindset/talk to. It is okay that I enjoy the taste of this donut right now. I just have not weighed the long-term cost over the short-term pleasure my tastebuds receive.
"I know these cigarettes (alcohol) are bad for me. I don't care." Change this mindset/talk to. I want to associate pain with these cigarettes. At this time, cigarettes are more important than my having ideal energy.
"I feel good after a few drinks. Alcohol is not bad for me." Change this mindset/talk to. I associate pleasure with the short-term effects of alcohol while ignoring alcohol's mounting costs over time.
"My weight gain (any condition) is bad." Change this mindset/talk to My weight gain is purposeful. Even if it is uncomfortable now, it has a purpose. I feel uncomfortable at this weight.
Always / Never:
"I have always had blood pressure issues."
Change this mindset/talk to, "My blood pressure started to elevate when…"
"I have always eaten this way."
Change this mindset/talk to, "In the past, when I have eaten pro-inflammatory foods, they slowly created illness."
"Everything in moderation is normal."
Refrain or change this mindset/talk to, "Meth and arsenic in moderation are as silly as eating donuts and other pro-inflammatory foods in moderation."GOOD VERSUS BAD Instead of "good and bad," we focus on our purpose and the cost/benefit of the behavior. The medical model and the justice system both require good and bad to decide the treatment. The (VP) Victim-Perpetrator model never labels good or bad—just purposeful or painful. Meth, heroin, and excessive alcohol do not take you closer to your purpose and freedom; they cause pain. The part of the pain involved with drugs or excessive drinking is that it guides you to associate pain with the addiction and focus on the internal if you are open to change.
The purposes of each condition.
WHY THINGS ARE NOT GOOD OR BAD…
Why many health issues remain or progress is because of the patient's unwillingness to change. Holistic and allopathic medicine labeling conditions as good or bad harms you and fails to help you change.
Good and bad thinking refuses to look at the purpose of the condition. If Anxiety, depression, weight gain, etc., are bad, there is no room to find the purpose and the cause.
If we want to change, it requires that we go against something we believed in and acted upon. We believed potato chips, fast food, or overeating was okay. Just because your doctor or naturopath tells you that certain foods are bad doesn't mean you will change and become conscientious long-term and maintain health. We know that over 80% of illnesses like cancer, diabetes, weight gain, etc., are caused by diet/lifestyle.
The reason change is resisted is linked to seeing things as good or bad. Other reasons change is resisted are * Not having a purpose * Poor Choice of Words * Poor Communication * Not Understanding your Beliefs, * projecting blame externally, and * Your personality traits that have not matured. Most Importantly a disconnect from your feelings that are connected to your beliefs - See Ultimate Exercise.
If you see overeating as bad, you will likely resist change. If you see not exercising as bad, you will likely resist making exercise an enjoyable habit. The same applies to the person smoking cigarettes or abusing alcohol. When we are stuck in a personality trait (or buried emotions) that is harming, it is defended because of good vs. bad thinking. More importantly, is that if you don't see the purpose in the condition, you will naturally see it as 'bad."
Instead of labeling actions or thoughts as good or bad, we will label them as either bringing you joy or pain. Or put them in terms of how they make you feel. Even though it may not appear to be a big deal, it is. After this shift, you will see two things happen. One, you will now see how the action or thought costs you, and second, you will gladly make the change because you have no guilt or shame for being 'bad.'
Change requires a shift from external (i.e., blame) to internal (i.e., accountability) by gently accepting our vices and pain as purposeful. If we make the vice "bad" and the virtue "good," we get stuck following an outdated map that doesn't work and, in many ways, has caused a barrier to healing.
This course will not be embraced by someone who blames simply because of the lack of appreciation for all things being purposeful. The person wanting to argue that sick is bad and healthy is good is stuck on judgment and separation. The person who wants to find an exception with genetics or an accident does the same.
If the focus is based upon good or bad, fear or guilt, the outcome will be built upon that focus's foundation. The focus is on the outcome. You cant be healthy by thinking illness is bad.
It's why addiction programs and diets don't work. Without the shift from 'good' and 'bad,' thinking addiction programs, diets, etc., are stuck in a perpetual map of 'fighting.' If we make the focus connecting with a higher purpose, the outcome is connecting with a higher purpose and true healing.
Money problems labeled as "bad" will automatically change the focus on who or what is to blame. It is why 80 percent of people get stuck with money problems.
Relationship counsel that labels one or both partner's behavior as "bad' will always lead to two victims and two preparators in that relationship. This concept will be explained and built upon.
Health labeled as "bad" will lead you to focus on finding fault: which bug, which gene, which allergy, which food caused the problem ... rather than what you have control over to heal.
Exercise: Pen and Paper
How would you describe the world in five (more if you want) words? Good/Bad. Describe it. Many answers I have received include and are not limited to scary, beautiful, violent, expensive, trusting, etc. (Be Honest)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Who or what do you have the most issues with (i.e., my ex, my spouse, mother-in-law, liberals/conservatives, etc.) - You will refer back to this question later in the course.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Next to each person's name, write what needs to change about them.
Who or what do you have the most issues with: co-workers, clients, work, partner, kids?
You could be thinking that we are way off, and this is not what my doctor told me. How could so many people be wrong? How could so many people follow those who teach the wrong map? History repeats and shows that the masses have historically followed incorrect maps and passed on these wrong maps to others.
It is easy to go along with the masses and say I need a drug, pill, vaccine, or treatment in some ways. It is not just the system you need to go against; it is Hollywood, movies, the medical model, and friends and family stuck with the old map. If you want to believe in good or bad, ask yourself if that has helped you overcome your illness or issue? Do diets that labeling you or your food choices as good or bad work for you? Have addicting programs worked? Many counselors and doctors are jumping up and down, proclaiming that they are not shaming and invoking guilt in their "new" treatment programs or diets. Sadly, they are a wolf in sheep's clothing: They merely use the words and embrace the Germ Theory, which makes things more confusing and worse for you. I have yet to find one that does not do this—except this victim-perp method.
When you are doing "good" in the back of your mind, you will be thinking of messing up in the future. An example would be you go to an AA meeting (or diet), and everyone is excited you hit the one-year mark. You get a lot of compliments, a new coin, and recognition for your hard work. You now feel like you are the right person but dread the feeling of messing up and becoming a "bad" person. The next week you lose your job, and you stress yourself out about how to pay all your bills. You decide to take a drink and forget about the problem for a while. You have erased your "good" clean-time of a year and realize the next time you go to AA. You will need to tell the group about your relapse. This relapse is considered 'bad' because you are claiming that abstinence was good. You will have feelings of guilt, failure, and shame. You may think this is splitting hairs, and some things are good, and others are bad. I claim that if you take the VP, non-Germ Theory-model, and stay away from alcohol for a year, you don't have the subconscious angst about failure, good/bad, you will be better equipped for challenges and will be resilient when or if they arise. The connection is good is perfect, bad is evil. When the reality is, we are humans finding our way, and the "perfect/evil" map causes more addiction and illness. This is the pattern: you do a diet to lose weight. You have been "good" for three months and lost 30 pounds. You felt motivated and abstained from overeating. After your motivation stops (usually 3 - 6 months), you see and crave donuts, McDonald's, potato chips, and so you eat them because they taste so good to you. We call this relapse, and the person is at the beginning of gaining their old weight back and likely extra weight.
What is essential to understand is that because the person's association with being good and bad was the focus, it was built on fear, shame, guilt, or perfection. So when they taste the fatty foods that in their mind taste great and subconsciously say to themselves, "I am bad," they ultimately decide that they do not want to lose weight because of the fear, shame, and guilt tied to the process. This must be understood to proceed! Said another way: No person wants to feel fear, shame, guilt, and evil. Being "bad" knocks on the door of fear, shame, guilt, and evil. When the person eats the donut, it tastes great, and then they know they will gain weight. They have to choose between being bad (evil) or just being overweight. Most choose overweight because they can blame it on something. This is no different than meth, heroin, or alcohol abuse or addiction. Because you associate pleasure with these substances and feel shame and guilt being "bad," you are caught in this tug-of-war. The easy way is to find something to blame as the medical system does. That is until now!
Suppose you can take out the good and bad judgments in your life and start being easier on yourself. In that case, I guarantee you will begin to connect pain with meth, heroin, pills, drugs, poverty, overeating, and alcohol and shift to pleasurable feelings from healthy behaviors in your everyday life.
When you can see how making judgments of those 'good' things connected to your vice, you will get fast results. For example, one may believe that being superior or better than someone is 'good.' A
How is this possible? It's simple. It starts with what you say and how you allow the drugs/alcohol to bring joy or pain. You can't deny that meth brings a lot of short-term pleasure for someone that is craving a high, or the "buzz" you get from alcohol brings similar joy. You don't have to pretend like it doesn't. Just admit that you enjoy the high or the buzz that you receive from the drugs or alcohol. Then think of the cost of that high/buzz. Is it worth going to jail, losing your teeth, having brain problems, losing your job, or having family problems?
When you admit that the secondary gain (pleasure of the high/ buzz) has value, we can show you that the high cost isn't worth the gain you get from it. The same rule can be applied to alcohol. I've worked with clients whose secondary gain from drinking was being funnier, talking with people easier, making more sales, and being more confident. But when we added up the cost (medical bills, failed relationships, new problems from drinking), they could see that it wasn't worth the short-term high/buzz.
When a person purposely gains a lot of weight (becomes obese) and then decides it is too painful and wants the weight gone, a struggle happens. Weight loss can be challenging (relatively based upon having or not having a purpose). From a subconscious level, people would rather be overweight than feel like a failure (evil) when they eat the donuts, chips, fast food, etc., that taste so good. Faced with fear, shame, guilt, and evil, everyone decides being overweight is easier than feeling these emotions. The second and equally pressing problem is that for a person to lose weight successfully, the emotional block that led them to overeat in the first place must be resolved. The same goes for the alcoholic or meth user who purposefully becomes addicted and then decides the addiction is too painful and wants to stop. The failure in their ability to stay is the same as the obese person. The meth high or alcohol use feels and tastes so good while, at the same time, being a failure (evil) and feeling guilt or shame is so painful that the user decides subconsciously that the pain of feeling shame and guilt is worse than using the meth or alcohol. Ironically this is precisely how obesity—or any illness—is started. The unresolved emotional pain was so unbearable that it didn't matter how destructive the drugs were when you decided to use drugs to numb it.
Simply put, humans will go to any length to cover up the pain (or vice). Forcing someone to stop the pain "relief" (i.e., meth, alcohol, etc.) without addressing the emotional pain is torture. Furthermore, feeling sorry for a person's past abuse or hardship causes more emotional pain. Social workers and counselors are not equipped to empower those addicted because they believe in a Germ Theory map that focuses on the external.
Emotional pain is likely the number one cause of addiction, illness, and obesity. If you don't address the emotional causes, the emotional triggers, and the good and bad thinking, you will stay with the addiction and look for blame.
Exercise: Pen and Paper
1. I want to know the reason I started to overeat or abuse alcohol.
2. I want to address the stress (vice) and no longer cover up my feelings.
Recommended to say this while you consume or abuse toxic things:
• “Overeating is more important than ________.”
• "Getting drunk is more important than my health."
• "Eating this donut (or any processed food) is more important than my ."
• "Using this meth is more important than having teeth."
These simple sentences will start to change everything. At some point in your life, you will be connecting pain with the drink or drug or food instead of thinking of it as good or bad.
The Germ Theory is the perfect example of good and bad. It says the bug is bad, and illness is bad. It says, "kill the bug," and things are good. If you believe this, you will most likely be stuck in your addiction. The reality is that the bug is purposeful and useful. Yes, we are saying obesity, meth, and alcohol are all equally purposeful and useful. Your emotions of fear, anxiety and anger are purposeful, NOT bad. Happiness, peace, and love are also purposefully guiding us to our purpose.
Vices and Virtues and not good or bad. Being afraid(fear/coward) is not bad. It may be life-saving, or painful, or uncomfortable. If we think it is bad,' we shy away from confronting it. So we can say being afraid does not allow me to live my life to the fullest.
After completing the Ultimate Exercise, you will learn that each vice provides temporary pleasure or positive feelings. Each virtue provides you pleasure and happiness. We learn that with each vice, there is a hangover negative feeling. Because the negative hangover feeling from the vice guides us to healing (or virtue), we can be thankful for the experience and not label it as bad.
Your aliment or addiction is not good or bad either. The Emotion-Link teaches that there is a gift in illness that leads us to become whole.
Healthy adrenal glands, balance hormones for stress, survival, and sexuality, they control blood sugar, burn protein, and fat. Stress management starts with adrenals functioning well.
When we experience too much stress, our adrenals deal with the demand and send messages and symptoms that we are over drafting the bank account. Symptoms include fatigue, dizziness, lightheadedness, sugar craving, salt craving, light sensitivity, hot flashes, low blood pressure, insomnia, loss of body hair, or skin discoloration. These symptoms direct us to fill up the tank and get back on track. Filling up the tank is a combination of putting nutrients into our bodies and resting.
The constructive aspect of adrenal symptoms is the information that we are either doing too much or depleting nutrients (or poor diet) faster than we are replenishing them based on the demands of our lifestyle. If you take each symptom, you can identify how they are purposeful:
The destructive aspect of adrenal symptoms is robbing Peter to pay Paul. If our fatigue is ignored or more caffeine or stimulants versus rest and replacement, we will break down. The symptoms associated with progressed fatigue include blood sugar problems, loss of body hair, light sensitivity, low blood pressure, and progress to multiple illnesses like osteoporosis, weight gain, diabetes, heart disease, etc.
The emotional connection of adrenal fatigue gives us a reason or an excuse for failure because I am exhausted. Being defeated is painful, so I need a reason to rest. When I am competing, I blame myself, and I am hard on myself, I am going in the wrong direction, off track. These symptoms and hitting the wall make me look at my purpose and values.
What is stress? Is it good, or is it bad? What is its purpose?
Physical Stress: ranges from posture, to exercise, too little to too much causes stress. The ideal amount of exercise will reduce stress, too much or too little will cause stress.
Chemical Stress: anything you put in or on your body. Toxic chemicals, processed foods, air pollution, drugs, and microbes in excess cause stress to the body. In contrast consuming whole food, clean water, and air reduces stress.
Electromagnetic Stress: Radiation in both forms non and Ionizing radiation causes stress along with too much x-ray, radio waves, wifi waves, 4G or 5G waves, microwaves, ultraviolet light, etc. Negative ions from the atmosphere and UV light from the sun are stress reducers.
Emotional Stress: Repressed emotions, misguided beliefs, worry, fear and anger, grief, or trauma cause stress. In contrast love, connection, and faith reduce stress.
All illness is linked to one or a combination of the stresses listed above. There are few if any treatments or pills that address this problem. The answer is in true stress management address the four (stresses) causing illness.
Adrenals are central to stress management.
Stress is the starting point for most illnesses and symptoms. The irony of this is how there is added stress in telling you your illness is stress-related with no map on how to manage it or what stress is.
Stress management is Body & Brain Management 1) Brain/emotion management and 2) Body/physical management is united, but for ease of explanation, we will separate them. The body part of stress management is our physical well-being. Our physical state is dictated by diet, air, water, food, rest, etc. When these areas are balanced, we can handle situations more effectively. To illustrate this, let us take two different scenarios. This same person, if depleted, would likely react differently when
hungover and depleted of reserves.
Last night you got drunk, skipped dinner, then woke up too late to eat breakfast. You had to race to work or face being late, again. Someone carelessly cut you off on the road. Chances are, you would respond with anger or anxiety. Now situation #2, last night you went to bed early. You got up in time to do your morning exercise; you prepared and ate a balanced breakfast, and then left for work early. Someone carelessly cut you off on your drive to work. This time you barely glanced his way and continued with little to no stress. In the second scenario, the person had the physiological reserves to handle stress. This same person, if depleted, would likely react differently when hungover and exhausted of reserves.
Brain/thought management has to do with how we interpret situations. Because when it comes down to it, it is not the stress but how we react to it that makes all the difference. Two people can be in an identical situation and respond in totally different styles. Our interpretation of the situation makes all the difference. When we ask a different question of ourselves, we get a different answer. Our physical state, combined with our mental state, determines how we respond.
Natural treatments like massage, laser, chiropractic adjustments, etc. are not healing. Discovering or finding out the cause of that “issue” is the real question. You may be surprised to learn that, in most cases, it is an underlying problem at the root. If STRESS came to mind, you are heading in the right direction. What was the cause of the tight muscle, weekend ligament, or disc? In most cases, it is stress (nutritional, emotional, and physical) that causes the problem, not a deficiency in massage, lasers, or adjustments.
I’d like to share a story about a patient that came to see me for some neck problems. He related to me that his former chiropractor had not satisfied him. He tried alternative measures with negative results. He understood the stress connection. That was why he ultimately came to me. I explained how the foods we eat make a profound effect on muscles, along with breathing/water consumption and emotions.
During his second visit for an adjustment, he asked me, “What causes this neck pain? My last chiropractor said the vertebra was out, and it is interfering with the nerve.” So I explained to him that muscles move bones. In other words, muscle tension may cause the “bone to go out of place.” So He said, “So the real cause of my neck pain is muscle tension?”. I asked him what causes muscle tension. He replied, “I get it. It’s the stress that causes the muscle tension, that causes the bone to go out of place, that irritates the nerve, that causes the pain.” He almost had it. I asked him what the difference between two people reacting entirely differently in a similar situation is. i.e., the reason your neck muscles are stiff is that your boss yelled at you. How can it be then that your co-workers received the same tongue lashing and shrugged it off with no resulting muscle tension?
Is ‘stress’ a manifestation of pain? Or is the pain the result of stress? Stress is neither bad
nor good; rather, it is a guide. Pleasure and pain are deeply connected, in that pleasure(s)
are not appreciated without the ability to experience pain. The preceding is not
philosophical. It is science. The purpose of pain is a warning that something dangerous or
harmful is affecting the area. Pain directs us to make changes. Pain guides us to look at the
emotions. Why would we ever want to suppress these signals which would be similar to
taking the batteries out of the smoke detector?
A thought to ponder as you address your symptoms. We would all agree that stress causes illness; science has proven this without a doubt. Many, however, don’t believe the opposite, that is, that peace, virtue, and our connecting with emotions can heal. Yes, you can heal yourself by reversing the process!
Overload of (Emotional, Chemical, Structural or Electromagnetic) creates illness if:
Illness is linked to one or a combination of the stress overloads listed above. There are few if any treatments or pills that address the stress/overload listed above. Change or healing happens when we address one or all of the four (stresses) causing illness.
Stress starts in the brain and connects with the corresponding body part. The overload of stress changes personality and behavior, from smoking, drinking, and overeating to completing the cycle of anxiety, depression, and illness. The brain signals cortisol (stress hormone) in response to stress. Cortical has many positive and negative effects, all purposeful. One of its effects is weight gain. Claims that a pill can block cortisol are false. High cortisol increases cravings for sugars for survival. This increases weight. Cortisol also decreases hormone production to protect you. As hormones decrease and cortisol stays elevated, the cycle ensues.
Increase Cortisol/Stress
Health Conditions Linked to Low Levels of hormones (DHEA) and High Cortisol/stress
Side note:
The sympathetic, and parasympathetic systems complement each other by working mainly in opposite directions. One is the accelerator pedal in your car, the other is the brake pedal. Both are necessary to get to your destination. We can’t get to our destination with only the brake pedal or only the accelerator pedal.
In the third part of the autonomic nervous system, the enteric nervous system, otherwise called our belly brain, will be discussed later.
Referring back to the two scenarios driving to work. What gave the rested person the ability to resiliently address being cut off while driving was a balanced sympathetic, parasympathetic system. What feeds these systems are nutrients in food, rest or sleep, and chemicals produced with emotions.
Emotional Steps
Do the Ultimate Exercise for 15-30 minutes a day for one month. You have completed the course when you are able to state the belief for each vice and virtue. Once you have this knowledge you will start to become of the buried feelings connected to each vice. Or if you are experiencing stress eating or emotional eating you can go back to the eLink and ask yourself if the secondary gains or temporary admissions apply.
Using the classes in the advanced course will solidify your work (see below).
Nutrition Step
Access Dr. Cola for personalized nutrition recommendations.
Lifestyle Step
Sometimes exercise is the best recommendation when experiencing anxiety. While in many cases, a client that is exhausted is better suited to rest and sleep. I do not recommend exercise for all clients. Exhausted clients will benefit most from breathing exercises and rest. (see advanced course)
Copyright © 2023 A Course in Health - All Rights Reserved.
Powered by GoDaddy
We use cookies to analyze website traffic and optimize your website experience. By accepting our use of cookies, your data will be aggregated with all other user data.